The Ruins of My Life
by Darial Goldscythe Kuznetsova
Summary: In the end, there was nothing waiting for him. Spinoff from my story, not telling you is it a spoiler or not.


**Title:** The Ruins of My Life  
**Series:** Wolf and Raven  
**Author:** Darial K  
**Fandom:** Naruto  
**Pairing**: Neji/Sagahi (OC)  
**Rating:** R  
**Warnings:** Death, suicide, war  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own the song (from Sonata Arctica) or the characters, which belong to Masashi Kishimoto, and I am not making money with this. This is written for fun and I don't mean to hurt anybody with this.  
**Type:** Songfic, tragedy, spinoff, deathfic  
**Summary:** When he finally returned, there was nothing waiting for him. Only death.  
**A/N:** Spinoff to my WIP series. I'm not telling is this "canon" with my storyline or not, I just leave you hanging.

* * *

**Chapter 1.**

_The Land was then young, I was fighting for it like everyone  
Ready to die for the cause, for my King, for my Lord  
_

I left you standing there, at the gate of our home, dressed in that beautiful ice blue yukata that always seemed to make you ten times more gorgeous, black hair swaying in the morning breeze. I knew your beauty would rival the Goddess the day we were supposed to marry. With heavy hearts we had to postpone it and I needed to go to the War. I really hoped this would be the last Shinobi War, no more horrors to ruin yet another generation. I felt your eyes on me even at the gates of Konoha, and when I looked up, I saw you standing on top of the gate with several other Hyuuga female that stayed behind.

_You were my reason to live, to fight another day  
You were the only one for me, and you were only for me  
_

We argued a little. We both know you are more than capable of fighting, you are one of the most lethal kunoichi when irritated enough, but still. I can't risk you. You are the one I'm fighting for. I just can't focus if I know you are somewhere, fighting for your life, alongside your family. It's something I just can't take. I'm a Leaf shinobi, I need to protect my land with everything I've got. I know you understand me. You have done that with your own village for ages.

_Another year I would be gone  
The war was leading us so far apart  
I built a house to keep you there  
Waiting for me, waiting…_

"Neji?"

"Don't open your eyes yet."

"Neji!"

"I'm not gonna let you fall over, relax."

"Man, you are an odd one."

"Alright, open them now."

I can't help but smile at the memory of your awed face. It gives me strength to cut down another undead.

"Is that..."

"It's our new home."

I had you speechless for the first time of your life.

_No-one remembers my face nor my name  
In a dream, I´d stay here forever  
Headstone on my grave, words carved in vain  
All these wounds only heal when I´m home_

Whatever I had expected from this war, other than mindless killing and blood covered fields and forests, was not this. Not my long-dead father against me. Even if I could kill him, would I be able to? My heart is bleeding when I look at the eyes of the dead, a shadow of my own father. How can I end this fight? For the first time during this war, I wish you were here beside me, I know you would never give up until he was returned to the other side.

I try to get up, my insides are burning, lungs desperately needing air that was knocked out of me. I don't want this to end like this. I want to return to you. And I will return to you. Before I can get onto my feet, I see my uncle attacking his own twin, nobody sees me there. I drag myself to the nearest medic, poor Sakura is doing everything she can. She doesn't even recognize me, just heals me, helps me up and tries not to scream upon seeing an Aburame clan member getting his head severed.

_The Taste of their blood in my mouth, and the scent of victory  
Scarred my soul for life, This man was not me_

I cut through everyone in my path. Blowing up hearts and cutting off chakra pathways. Someone said I had lost my heart. It is still there, only buried beneath all this hate and despising.

_Love is a game for the weak to play, they said  
I loved and love made me many times stronger_

I don't know who he was. He just threatened to kill me and then hunt everyone I held dear down and have his way with them. I just lost it. Nobody touches you, nobody can even dream about you. You are the one who holds my heart, despite your rough personality, that my family said you were too uncivilized, I love you and I will do anything for you. Anything.

_Another year I would be gone  
The war was leading us so far apart  
I built a house to keep you there  
Waiting for me, waiting…_

No-one remembers my face nor my name  
In a dream, I´d stay here forever  
Headstone on my grave, words carved in vain  
All these wounds only heal when I´m home

We are winning the battle. Kakashi and Gaara found a way to finish off the undead for good, Alliances strongest ninja facing down Uchiha Madara. I can see Shanti's rage from miles away. She faced down Sasuke and turned him against their ancestor. Perhaps this war is finally ending and we can get peace.

_"Everything ends...everything dies...  
Now I know the Legends only lived in his lies."_

What is this rumor I keep hearing? The last descendants of the legendary clans finally sent Uchiha Madara to the oblivion. Why do they keep saying you are part of that clan? I see your mother working to heal Shanti with little knowledge she has. And she's supposed to be a member of the legendary clan that was thought to be lost? She can't even read. All I care now is to get to you, to our home.

_My Long and winding road, river and trees by the hills we lived on  
The ruins of my life I find, a signet ring on the ashes,  
I know my Lord betrayed me, my reason to live was taken away  
I carry my loved one to the hills we loved, for the last time…_

The air gets colder the closer I get to our home. I notice the three leaves being frostbitten, black and dry. Soon the trees turn into ice statues, everything is frozen, like an icy shockwave had hit the area. I try to shake the feel of dread, most likely you have just tried to keep people away from you.

My heart freezes like those trees. There is no house waiting for me. From short radius away from the spot our home was, the remains of the cold shockwave start, chilling the forest, but there's nothing there. Only few charred logs covered in frost. I choke on my breath. I feel all the wounds weighing me down.

Slowly I drag my heavy feet towards the ashes, stopping just in front of the steps. In the pile of the dark grey powdery ash, lies a silvery ring, slightly melted, still bearing the Hyuuga insignia. You were supposed to be the first lady of the branch. I pick the jewel up and slowly lift my gaze towards the center of the house, where I can see the shockwave originating from.

My world comes down around me. There you lie, in the ashes, the pale blue yukata slightly burned around you. You look like you would be only sleeping. You should have been burned to death, but your ice element protected you until your breath. Your bloodline limit was a curse, until it turned out to be a gift in the end.

I pick you up, your head tucked beneath my jaw and I head to the tiny hills behind our house. You loved it there and whatever made you happy, made me happy. I feel the coldness from you seeping through my clothes. I lay you down on the frosty grass within the little stone circle we made for training.

I've lost you.

_I close your eyes, kiss you goodbye  
The only one who ever loved me  
I´m crushed inside, darling, my life…  
It shall end here…_

_Headstone on your grave, words carved in vain  
Now the darkness covers me…_

Searing pain shoots through my spine when I strike to end my life. When I fall to your embrace, I see the two words you have carved to one of the stones in the circle and I can't help but scream my agony.

I've... lost... everything...


End file.
